I am approaching drunk. I think.

Seems like a good time to advice everyone else on the finer points of life which I'm sure you're all missing.
First:  Soup is good. I could live on soup and breadsticks very happily for the rest of my life. I am reminded of this every time I eat at Olive Garden.
Second: Mashed potatoes are better with garlic, too much butter, and gravy of just about any sort.
Third: You should have more sex. Well-sexed people are happy, mellow, slow to anger, easy to laugh, and more positive than their less-sexed neighbors - proably because no matter how bad things are there's always more sex coming soon.
Fourth: I haven't thought of a fourth yet.
Fifth: Good life lessons can be learned from reading everything about Sherlock Holmes. When I'm done with the book I'm sure you can request it from your local library.
Sixth: Terry Pratchet is awesome. The man created his own world, that rides on the back of four elephants that stand on a giant turtle that floats through space. Like I said, freaking awesome.
Seventh: Canadian whiskey is quite pleasing when accompanied by Coke and lime. I'll keep you posted as to whether headaches are a problem.
Eighth: The word eighth has too many 'h's.
Nineth: I've decided that the best way to grow eyebrows is to shave them off. Think about it - it'll make perfect sense.
Tenth: Feeling like Gumbi is not an entirely unpleasant feeling. Perhaps this is my unique reaction to alchol?

In closing, I would like to direct your fascinated attention to this video on making curls with paper bags.